Millions of viewers tuned in last Wednesday for the long-awaited season premiere of Lost. We did too. We watched, open-mouthed and in literal shock, when we found out that the island is not only moving in space...but in TIME. But our state of shock was not because we were incredibly impressed with the genius of Abc writers. Instead, we were dumbfounded as to WHY ANYONE WOULD PROMOTE UNREGULATED TIME TRAVEL?!?!?!?!?! Never once did we receive a petition in the mail to use the time machine. Never once did the producers of Lost try and contact us. Thus, there is absolutely no legitimacy in their "time travel" claims and we therefore cannot claim to be supporters of this show any longer. You might think, "but what about your 'Numba 1 LOST fan' tattoos?!" but I caution you, do you want to live in a world when a person can travel anywhere, anytime without any limits?! We certainly don't.

In other news, the inauguration was really big news for our endeavors. With Obama's new plan of action to cut down on the amount of time travel terrorism and unregulated time travel, we have reason to celebrate. Finally our tax dollars will be put to good use!